I had the most ingenious idea on the way home from work! It’s a business plan: one that caters to a niche with an unmet need.

See, I’ve had my cell phone for five years. That’s apparently a lot like being married for 60 years: few people get there, but everyone respects you for it. In the same way that couples of 60 years are very attached to each other, I have become very attached to my cell phone. It hasn’t given any indication of impending death quite yet, but when it does, I will feel a little sad. It’s like a friend to me. I’ve known it twice as long as I’ve known my wife. I don’t know that I’ll ever feel quite right with another phone. It just won’t be the same.

Which brings me to the aforementioned unmet need: there are probably thousands of people like me with devices and gadgets they are very close to, and those gadgets will eventually cease to function. What do you do with a dead phone, GPS, or flash drive? You bury it!

Tombstone

I’m tearing up already.

People might feel a little embarrassed if house guests saw a tombstone in their back yard comiserating a gadget, but for a fee, they can have their beloved gadgets tucked under a remote patch of Missouri soil! I’m going to be rich!

Ye contrarians have already started forming your rebuttals, so I’ll address them one by one before you can throw ’em (though if I don’t, feel free to waste as much time commenting as I did writing this).

  • I would purchase a plot of land with enough space for at least 100 burial spaces, then expand as business needs dictated.
  • I’d guarantee burial plots for 5, 10, or 15 years, prices increasing with time. More years can be purchased and added onto the original plan.
  • I’d offer up-to-date photos of the tombstone and plot for a fee at any time (emailed to them within two business days), or unlimited photo requests for a monthly fee.
  • Flowers, dolls, or anything else could be set beside the tombstone for a fee.

It’s just perfect! There’s no way this could go wrong! Who wants to invest? Who wants to be my first customer? Come on, anybody?

original image source

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